Still on Winter Break Mode

Academically, this has not been a good semester so far. I’m behind in readings for almost every class, and for the first time in my life (besides Math 2230 last semester), I am having trouble understanding some of the lectures. It’s not because they are hard, just that I am not reading, and thereby not learning the background with which to understand them.

Now that I think about it, only one of my classes last semester was mostly textbook based. The rest were highly lecture based. That suited my learning style well—I’m really good at absorbing what people say. This semester, it has become the opposite, in that only one class is not textbook based. And I guess I have not gotten used to reading textbooks yet.

Which leads me to the hypothesis, that I am still on winter break mode.

No, it’s definitely not just a hypothesis. It’s a thesis. More and more, I’m becoming estranged from education. I’m just coasting along right now. It’s kind of ironic because in high school I never suffered from senioritis. Maybe senioritis is an essential part of life. Maybe you have to get it at some point so you won’t have it later. Almost like a vaccination effect against a real disease. Because the problem is that I have senioritis right now, in my second semester of freshman year at college.

But if it is true that I am merely on winter break mode, that still doesn’t explain why this winter break was so much less productive than other breaks I have had. For instance, over the last summer break I read like 10 books; over winter break I read only 1. And it was a really short book at that.

So you do what you normally do in science: you dig back another layer. This leads me to the new hypothesis, that I am still on pre-winter break mode. What was pre-winter break? Finals.

That’s right. Once classes ended last semester, I went on coast mode because I’m not the type of person who studies for tests. But there’s still something unexplained. Even before classes ended, I was on coast mode. What happened right before that? Thanksgiving.

Of course, just saying Thanksgiving doesn’t explain a thing. No, it’s what happened right before Thanksgiving, and what I was doing throughout the month of November that paradoxically put me into this state: NaNoWriMo.

If doing NaNoWriMo taught me one thing, it was how to prioritize some activity ahead of schoolwork. I became pretty adept at it, but perhaps too adept, that it carried over into everything I did. Right now it’s just hard for me to look at a textbook for more than five minutes. I’m trying though.

Also, I have a very extensive project planned for the month of March: editing the NaNoWriMo novel. Perhaps I just need some closure on it. I’m in the “done with first draft” state, but it’s nowhere near finished. Also, I’m considering giving the actual text some more publicity this time. Just a thought.

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